Touched up and now it's ombre ish ☺
Monday, June 20, 2016
After 13 years. My baby has left me. I'm glad you only suffered a couple days. You left us in your beloved mommy's arms, my maid lyn. It was a heart breaking moment to hear my maid say she's no longer breathing and I petted her but she's really gone. The moment my hands start shaking and I started crying. It was a good 13 years with you...
I love you mimi.
Tuesday, June 14, 2016
Tuesday, June 7, 2016
I can't help. But wonder. What do you see in her. That after all these years of asking me out. You end up with her again. That it's so easy for you to let go of me, to end this thing that lasted 2 years 2 months and 20 days. Yes, I counted.
When I think of it. You never made me smile. You never really did anything to make me happy. Except that one time you fetched me home from work. But there are tiny gestures you do that show me deep down you care a little.
I'm sorry I can't "just be happy" like you told me a couple days ago. I was feeling better. Then I lost the one thing that will show me what you are up to. Okay. No big deal.
These days I wake up with the same thing on my mind... why her? Why never me? Why nothing good ever happen to me? You are the one person I can't go a day without thinking about. Sometimes I'm fine. Sometimes just the thought of you and her makes me tear up.
and i`m still hoping...
Sunday, June 5, 2016
I don't hate you. I never will. I just hate how things turn out. How unfair it is. That I never get to be with you.
That this person who just comes back into your life and gets you. When I've been doing this for so many years and I still can't give up this fight but I have no choice.
You. I don't miss you. But I think about you every now and then. And when I pass by those familiar places...
Wednesday, June 1, 2016
It's been a really long time since I last blogged. A lot has changed. Actually no. Only one thing changed...
Him. The one person who I care most about. The one who's on my mind almost all the time.
He left. And we're done. For good.
I knew this day was gonna come sooner or later. But I didn't think it would be because of that person. I thought it would be me leaving because I can't take it anymore. But nope. I held on and kept telling myself. DON'T GIVE UP.
Why would I give up on someone that means the world to me eventhough he doesn't feel the same?
It sucks big time and I feel it's so unfair. That this girl who just came back into your life gets to be with you without trying. When I've been trying for so many years just to be with you.
You deleted our conversations. The only memory I have of you. I can't even look back at it and read all the words you used to say...
But thank you. I don't have to keep rereading our arguments, your empty promises and unanswered questions. I don't have to check social media to see who you're with anymore.
Even if I happen to stumble upon your update or hers. I'll be okay. I mean yes I'll get a little angry and sad. But there's nothing I can do to change things. Like you said.
The saddest memory of you will be the last day we meet. I'll never forget how you treated me. All the words u said. Only I will know what a monster you are.